The Good Life

When it comes down to it, few things in life bring more joy and satisfaction than being with the ones we love and eating good food together.

I had to start this post off with a pic of the fruit tart I made for our friend Dan Mower and his family on Thursday. Dan was our realtor and helped us to find our home when we came to Corning. He recently returned home from several weeks in the NICU with his baby boy Noah. To celebrate Noah's return I made him and his family a meal including Moroccan Beef Tagine with sweet potatoes and raisins over cous cous and the fruit tart for dessert.

I love cooking for others and creating something not only pleasing to the palette but pleasing to the eye and soul. There is something about sharing a meal with others that translates into the feelings and words and love that we can't quite express. Perhaps it is the satisfying of that very basic, humble need that we all have, to be fed and nourished, comforted and sustained.

Ben and Sol and their daughter came to our home on Friday with the missionaries to eat dinner and to have a discussion in our home. We had ginger-soy pork tenderloin, pesto pasta salad with roasted bell peppers, fresh mozz, calamata olives and cherry tomatoes, and vanilla ice cream with fresh berries and whipping cream. Sol is from Chile and was just baptized into our church on Saturday. It was a beautiful day for Sol and her family.

He's back in the saddle again. . .Shay has been so busy with work and travel to Asia and India that he hasn't cooked for a long. . .long time. I really miss his great cooking and having a little break from the kitchen once in awhile. He made his luscious omelettes on Saturday morning for a late breakfast.


The omelettes were stuffed with asparagus, red peppers, pepper-jack cheese, and bacon. Topped with cilantro and served with rice and chili sauce. We ate breakfast outside on the deck and enjoyed the crisp air and bright sun after days of rainy weather.

Miss America. . .Addie poses before church in her new dress.

Shay and I together after church. . .we don't take enough photos together. . .we finally got a few.

I made fish tacos for lunch with lemon-butter broiled Tilapia and tomato/avocado/scallion salsa.

I adore olives. . .my mission to Spain endeared me to these precious pearls. I love serving a plate at the table with lots of family meals.
I roasted yellow and orange bell peppers to add into the fish tacos.
Sweet Adelaide

Addie and Grandma Ka

Elijah and Grandma Ka on the playset

He is Not Here. . .

Shay, Addie, Elijah and I visited Jude's grave on the Saturday afternoon before Easter and brought some flower pots, a little birdbath and bunnies. Addie helped me to pick out the flowers and she was so excited to visit her baby brother's gravesite. Elijah loves to roam around the graveyard and pull mementos off of other people's graves--oops. I stood for a few minutes by myself while Shay and Addie chased down Elijee, next to the rectangular patch of newly seeded earth where Jude's grave had been dug and subsequently filled. I listened to the chimes tinkling around the cemetery at different graves, giving a voice to the wind. I remembered the day I helped to lower my baby's coffin into the earth. Elijah (not yet 2 years old) kept saying "Ohp, Ohp," which mean't "open." He wanted to open that box and see his brother one more time, set him free. It was so tender. It is a hard thing to wrap my head around--knowing that Jude's physical body lies there silent below the earth, but that his spirit, his Being continues to exist in another sphere. I've always believed this and been a faithful person, but when death happens for real to someone so close, it really makes you ponder these deep questions and to want more details about the hereafter.

When I start missing Jude and thinking about him being gone, I try to focus my mind on the fact that he is still there and that his spirit is aware, watching and listening. I call him by name and talk to him, and this is when the feeling of peace returns to my heart. I tell him my feelings and share my thoughts with him, and I am put at ease.

On Easter Sunday while we were in Sacrament meeting listening to talks about the Savior and His Atonement, Crucifixion and Resurrection, my mother-in-law received an unexpected phone call. It was my sister-in-law calling to let us know about a tragic death in our extended family. Shay's brother's wife Tess lost her older sister Briana in a fatal car crash on Saturday afternoon. My mother-in-law was visibly shaken after taking the call and she whispered the news to me as we sat together in the pew at church. The shock of this news and how it would impact Tess and her family overwhelmed me. I felt incredible love for their family and understood some of the emotions and thoughts that they would struggle with in losing their child and sister. The thought came into my mind. . .how senseless and injust this life would be if there wasn't more to our existence than mortality on earth. My own tragedy and the tragedies of others continue to build my faith in a loving Heavenly Father and Savior who have a greater plan that extends beyond the bounds of death and time. I know that all things will be restored and that all will be made equal and right. He is not here, for He is risen! These were the words of the angel at Christ's empty tomb. What glorious news that eases the sting and sorrow of death and gives us hope to move forward with faith in the unseen.

God bless you Briana and the whole Blackwelder family.

All Hail The Lemon Curd Tart

This is my second time making a homemade lemon curd tart. The first occasion was to celebrate Shay's return from a business trip and the most recent was to celebrate Easter and the hoped for return of warmth, sun and life. Although it was rainy and dull outside this Easter Sunday, we had our own little orb of light in the form of a most luscious lemon tart. If anyone is interested I used Anne Burrell's recipe from the Food Network--you can find it online. She calls it Meyer Lemon Curd Tart. I have made it with Meyer lemons and also regular lemons. I actually prefer regular lemons (more tart) rather than the sweet taste of Meyer lemons. I served it with fresh whipped cream and blueberries. We had a lovely dinner together with Shay's Mom and Dad at our home in Corning after church.

The Unsinkable Adelaide Eden Barlow

Our little Addie turned 5 years old at the end of October. She started Kindergarten this fall, and although she is one of the youngest in her class, she is well adjusted and comfortable in this new sphere. That is one of Addie's qualities that has always impressed me. . .her emotional maturity and ability to adapt quickly to new environments. She is never intimidated or scared, but rather excited and eager to meet new people and to take on new challenges. At her first parent teacher conference her teacher told me that her standout qualities are 1. respectful 2. helpful 3. kind to everyone.

Addie has experienced a lot this past year with the four month hospitalization of her baby brother Jude and his subsequent passing on August 20, 2010. During that time Addie and Elijah spent time between the Ronald McDonald House in Rochester, NY with Mommy and Daddy and Grandma and Papa's house in Ithaca being cared for by them and other family members who offered their love, support, and help. Countless members of our church volunteered to babysit Addie and Elijah during the weekdays that they were with us in Rochester, so that Shay and I could attend to Jude in the hospital and communicate with doctors and countless specialists trying to decipher his unusual case.

When Addie came to the hospital in the late afternoons, evenings, or on the weekends to visit with Jude, she was like a ray of light entering his hospital room. She always had a cheerful countenance and a sweet loving tone with her little brother. She would sing to him and shake toys for him to grab, kiss him and hug him and get right in the bed with him when she was allowed. She would bring him stuffed animals that he could cozy with and put stickers on the rails of his hospital crib. She always helped the nurses to bath him, change his diaper, or do anything that she could to show her baby brother how much she loved him and wanted to serve him. She never let his illness or the wires and tubes and machines frighten her or change her perspective on things. . .she just loved him completely and unconditionally and she only saw him as a perfect little angel in every way. Somehow, whenever Addie was around and attending to Jude, the fear and uncertainty that many times plagued my mind would just fade and I could feel a very eternal bond and connection between my children and between our family. I knew that somehow, no matter what happend--even if Jude passed away--everything would be ok and that there was a grand plan and purpose to everything that our family was experiencing.

I think that children are more connected because of their innocence and purity and the newness of their earthly experience here and they bring familiar thoughts and feelings to the surface. Mormons believe that we existed as Spirit children of loving Heavenly Parents in a premortal existence or heavenly sphere before coming to this earth to receive our physical bodies. We came here to have mortal experiences that would teach us and give us opportunities to make choices, to evolve and grow in wisdom, talent, intellect, spirituality, service and love, ultimately to return home to our Heavenly Parents and our Elder Brother and Saviour Jesus Christ.

Addie, I am so proud of you and the strong, courageous, and loving little girl that you have become. You have already endured some very intense experiences for such a young child, and you continue to move forward with energy, optimism, faith in God and trust for those who love you and care for you. I know that these experiences are preparing you for the amazing opportunities, blessings, challenges, disappointments and triumphs that this life will bring. May you always draw strength, wisdom, guidance and peace from the experience of loving and letting go of your sweet baby brother.

Hey Jude

My sweet Jude, it is almost a year ago now when I first held your warm wet body against my breast. Those first moments were so sacred and filled with a purifying love that connected not only our physical bodies but our eternal spirits. Looking at all of these pictures again, unfolding your earthly story, I just break into incredible tears. Your innocence and beauty, patience and calm, the struggle you endured in the hospital over 4 months of your little life, the last day that I held you in my arms and watched your sweet eyes close with the countenance of an angel returning to the Spirit World. There are moments that I ache for you my dear, and feel as if I have truly sacrificed part of my soul in losing you. But it is in these moments of utter longing and sorrow and tears that I cannot deny the peace and stillness which descend upon me. . .once again I am lifted up as though by heavenly strands which steady my heart and raise my thoughts to that eternal sphere. One day we will understand it all as we embrace again, our vision of God's eternal plan laid plain and clear before us, the purpose of our lives however short or long made manifest in all detail. Jude, I know that your spirit continues to exist and to progress even without your mortal body. I know that you are surrounded by family members that have passed on before you and who know you and embrace you and love you. I want to live my earthly life inspired by your purity and patience, using my gifts and talents to lift others and allowing this experience to sculpt my very soul into a masterpiece. I love you.

What's Cookin'

I've always been passionate about good food and good cookin', but since becoming a busy Mom of three and not having as much time to pursue hobbies, cooking is one of those few outlets I have for channeling my creative energy. Growing up, my mother instilled in me a respect for healthy, fresh ingredients. My friends thought I was a little bonkers when I would insist on eating things that were preservative free, without additives or artificial colors. I'm not a saint, but I still try as often as I can to cook from scratch and to avoid eating things with ingredients I can't pronounce.

My mother was a great cook and I learned a lot from watching her in the kitchen, helping when she'd let me, and eating her food. She was a bit territorial in the kitchen and liked to do things her way at her own pace and I have to admit that I inherited some of that same stubbornness and independence in la cocina. I cooked for myself and my friends during college, which gave me opportunities to practice and experiment with food. I also cooked often during my 18 month mission in Spain, allowing my technique and recipes to evolve as readily as I allowed my own heart and mind to absorb and filter new tastes, new places, new ways of approaching life. When I married my husband Shaylan 7 years ago, I finally had a faithful patron to cook for and I really found delight in pleasing his palette. Three babies later I am cooking more than ever and I am even more crazy about good food.

So I'm going to start posting about food and sharing recipes that I love to make for my family and friends that come to our home. When I say recipes, most of the time I don't measure and a lot of what I cook I have adapted, changed, or invented myself. But here goes. . .

APRICOT-GINGER GLAZED PORK TENDERLOIN

2 Petite Pork Tenderloins (I buy them in a double pack)
Soy Sauce (about 1/4 cup)
Apricot Preserves (about 1/2 cup)
Fresh Ginger (about 2 Tbsp minced)
Fresh Garlic (2-3 cloves minced)

I place tenderloins in a heavy stoneware baking dish that fits them just right with little room to spare. Add the soy sauce, preserves, ginger and garlic and "massage" all of the ingredients onto the meat until covered evenly. Let stand several minutes or marinate in frig ahead of time. Do not cover. Roast in preheated 400 degree oven on the middle rack for about 40-45 minutes. Remove from oven and let stand for 15 minutes before cutting so that juices can redistribute. Slice into medallions and serve over cous cous, top with natural juices from the pan. Finish off with sliced roasted red peppers and fresh cilantro sprigs on top.

I like to serve this dish with roasted sweet baby yams (butter and brown sugar melted on top) and sometimes steamed green beans tossed with tomatoes, extra virgin olive oil, balsamic vinegar, squeeze of lemon juice and salt/pepper to taste.

One of our family favorites!

Fall Babies

Today on the way home from church I noticed the tree tops beginning to blush against the crisp blue canvas of sky. Fall has always been my favorite time of year. The way the cool air tames the hot summer sun and seems even to sober and deepen your thoughts. The trees revealing their colorful old souls. Round pumpkins and apples and wise-eyed moons. And big bellies. Adelaide and Elijah both ripened and were harvested in the Fall, and shortly baby number 3 will be the third apple to fall from the tree. I really love having my babies during this season, as I feel that in birthing them I am somehow partnering with the earth in offering up a ripe, sweet harvest.